Sunday, February 10, 2008

Goodbye Ruby

"There's no time to lose" I heard her say
Catch your dreams before they slip away

Last week, I learned that my dear friend Ruby Tuesday, part of the Celtic Lions crew, was entering the last phase of her life's grand adventure. Her husband let us know that she was in hospice and that her doctors said she just had days left. The end came on Friday, February 8. Ovarian cancer is a pernicious, horrible disease. This last bit hasn't been easy.

Don't question why she needs to be so free
She'll tell you it's the only way to be

Ruby was a force of nature. A truly sassy diva with a quick tongue and a quicker wit, you didn't want to be on her bad side. But, if you were on her good side, there was much joy and laughter. "Attention: Tupperware Tarts!" would come the email--with some other nonsense or crazy story, making sure that no one took the small stuff too seriously.

Behind that veneer of fun was a will of steel that compelled her to keep going. Going, through all that chemo and doctor's visits and setbacks and tiny triumphs. She'd offer us just small glimpses into that world of doctors and treatments and tests, but mainly, our troop of Texas moms (Mother of Five, Puddlesplasher & Viewfinder and I) served as laughing therapy. We kept it light. She'd disappear for a bit, with those bits getting longer and longer, but always she'd be back with another dry observation on the absurdity of life and others. That she won't be back with a witty pun or a zinger has devastated us all.

She just can't be chained to a
Life where nothing's gained and nothing's lost at such a cost

For me, she was a great mentor. At first, she answered all my questions about traditional and postal letterboxing, but then our conversations broadened to life in general. She was a veteran of the PTO wars, been through years of OM/DI and knew quite a bit about raising out-of-the-box kids as well. I often say that she helped me learn how to raise sons and raise a ruckus at the same time, and my life has been much, much richer for it. Somehow, through sheer will, she managed to make it for major milestones in her boys' lives--graduations & weddings--making wedding favors and offering encouragement--a one-woman cheering section for her family.

Lose your dreams and you will lose your mind
Ain't life unkind?
Goodbye Ruby Tuesday, who could hang a name on you?
When you change...

Ruby was as creative as you'd expect. Although she'd usually draft her son to do the carving, she was an expert at gluing and transforming logbooks into stunning works of art. A postal from her was a treat for the senses. And several of her traditional boxes--the meese and the Scarlet Pimpernel--have been some of the highlights of my boxing days. Letterboxing was just a small part of who Ruby was. But, it was the window through which I got to know her. And as her boxes live on, I hope others will get to experience a bit of her too.

Peace my friend. And for those you leave behind.

...Still, I'm gonna miss you...

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

My thoughts and prayers go up for you, her sweet friend, and the others that knew and loved Ruby. I didn't know her, but I understand how it feels in the passing of a special friend. And, after all, because she was a fellow boxing addict, she was part of all of us.

With warmest thoughts and prayers,
Buttercup

Puddle Splasher said...

Well said, Dewberry. Ruby was one of the most special people I've ever had the privilege of knowing. She brought beauty and joy to my life, and I will carry her with me in my heart forever.
Puddle Splasher